by Robert White

Bobby “Extremely” White is currently in the middle of P90X, a 90-day work-out regimen that’s growing popularity with swing dance instructors. Each week, he reviews one of the programs 12 exercises, and gives an update on how it’s going and where it hurts.

Since I have finished the first three weeks of my second month, this week is a “recovery week,” which, if you remember, is only called a recovery week to trick you into actually pushing play on the Core Synergistics workout. We’ll talk about that workout today.

Day 1: Core Synergistics , Day 2: Yoga, Day 3: Stretch, Day 4: Yoga, Day 5: Core Synergistics, Day 6: Kempo (a martial-art type cardio workout), and Day 7: Lying in the fetal position, whimpering (rest day).

DAY 56

While in my second month of P90X, I was at Boston Tea Party, where a group of fellow p90Xers spent probably a half hour at the midnight breakfast buffet talking about p90x and boring onlookers. Among the group were Nick Williams, Mickey Pedroza, Dave and Kim, and myself. We discussed the women in the video we think Tony wants to make out with, the exercises we love or hate, the recovery drink, and techniques for working out.

Though it had to be totally the most inane conversation for anyone else in the area to be a part of, it got me really pumped up to workout the next day, and to vent about all the things I’ve been thinking and feeling throughout this process. I was inspired by those who had done the program, and hope, in turn, I said something that inspired those in the group who were just starting. It reminded me of how great it is to share something like this with someone. P90X involves things I’m beginning to love, things I hate, things I’m proud of, things I’m new to, things I can’t understand. It’s changing me, both physically and mentally. And somehow, cracking silly workout jokes with friends is reflective of a great feeling of community. I work out alone, in a small room, where all my struggles and personal battles take place. But I’m not alone. And that gives me strength to go back and struggle more.

Workout breakdown: CORE SYNERGISTICS

Core Synergistics is one of my favorite workouts (and not just because it sounds like a bullshit name, but is actually a pretty accurate description of the workout.) You start off feeling good, might not even feel like you’re working hard, and before you know it, you’re covered in sweat and rolling around on the ground. (Sounds like a great date—ZING!). The workout is about 40 minutes of various core exercises, including a few sets of yet-even-more-kinds of push-ups, imitating the act of putting boxes on a shelf, running with weighs, walking around in push-up stance for a minute, and Dreya Rolls, which are my personal favorite P90X Workout ever, despite the fact that Tony obviously only included them in the video in the hopes he could make-out with Dreya. Don’t do it, Tony; a gymnast might be fun for a fling, but she’s got high maintenance written all over her. Go for Pam. They call her Blam.

One of the exercises is called a Prison-Cell push-up, which is what you do when you’re incarcerated. You jump down into a push-up position, do a push-up, bring a knee into your stomach, do another push-up, bring the other knee into your stomach, and then do another push up and jump your feet back into your hands and come back to standing. Repeat. (7 weeks into the program, I can do 7 with a few tiny breaks, while Adam in the video pumps out 18 or so.) This got me thinking that Tony should do an entire workout series for criminals (P90-TO-LIFE -X), all of which are exercises that can be done in confined spaces and help felons. The Kenpo exercise can be geared more towards avoiding stabbings, the Yoga could be a little more aggressive, the use of horizontal bars in the area could surely lead to great exercises, and the heavy lifting exercises could include weaker cell mates. The video would include Tony’s new cell mates in place of the normal P90X crew. At the Boston Tea Party, I told this idea to My Other Personal Trainer, Nick Williams, who immediately impersonated Tony Horton: “We call him Tiny, but he’s not.”

But I digress.

The only problem with this workout is it takes up a lot of space, and needs some small weights to really get a lot out of some of the exercises, so it doesn’t travel the best. I actually owe the program another day of core synergistic because I tried to do it in a dorm room-sized space one time without weights, and felt like the workout went badly enough that I just as well might not have done it and just did an ab-ripper instead.

The Next Day, all the abs along my stomach and side poke out. It’s a good feeling. (Perhaps this is why it’s one of the last workouts of the program before you take your after pictures.)

STATS
Total abs ripped: 6,148

X-TREME COSTS
Hopefully, I’m done buying stuff for a week or two, except for protein. $50

TOTAL COST SO FAR: Approx. $1,240

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