Dear Casey: Etiquette for birthday songs or jam circles
by Casey Schneider
We’re pleased to announce the international debut of “Dear Casey”. For those unfamiliar with her column, Casey Schneider has been responding to swing dancers in an advice column format for a couple of years now on White Heat, advising Seattle dancers on everything from social dancing etiquette to bringing the grit back into Blues dancing. Over the next few weeks, we’ll be publishing ten of her most *serious* posts to introduce you to her column. Send your questions to casey@lindybloggers.com
Dear Casey,
Is there any etiquette for birthday songs or jam circles, i.e. how long to let someone dance before jumping in or priority for who gets to jump in first?
Sincerely, Waiting to Jump
Excellent question! “Improper” behavior is one of my pet peeves in RE jams of any kind.
Yes, there’s etiquette and then there’s reality. For a birthday dance, I would say etiquette - and knowledge of this dance - dictates waiting for at least a phrase in slow to mid-tempo song, and possible two if the song is very fast. Now, reality dictates that not everyone will do this, and some people are so popular that you might need to cycle through more quickly to satiate the desire of all the non-birthday dancers. But in REAL reality, none of us are that cool, so give a person a phrase, people. It’s not hard.
For a jam, it’s a wee different, because it requires cognizance of whether the person/couple preceding you is building to something (which could also apply to aforementioned birthday jam). If it’s an end of a phrase and they’re in the middle of some big trick, wait it out. If it’s just general dancing, don’t steal anyone’s glory (except Phil’s, I’m OK with that ), but don’t feel badly about entering at the beginning of a new phrase. And be sure to make eye contact with anyone else obviously waiting to enter the jam. Swing dancers are notoriously horrible at reading other people’s body language and social cues, however, so this will probably be a horrible failure. Good luck.
As for priority, it’s whoever gets in the circle first without being a jerk to everyone else. Don’t be a circle jerk.
Phew, I’m spent!
-Casey
Just one phrase? A lot of phrases in (lindy hoppable) jazz won’t last more than a couple bars. That’s one, two, or maybe three swingouts (or other 8-count moves) at most. That doesn’t seem like much time.
Did you mean a chorus? They’re usually 32 bars in an AABA or similar song, which would be 16 swingouts (that might be too much), or 12 bars in most blues-based songs which would be 6 swingouts.
Steve,
Nope, I did not mean a chorus, although that’s a fair enough question. You’re right, a phrase is not much time, but what I probably didn’t make clear is that one should give at least a phrase, and ideally not to interrupt in the middle of one. This is a pet peeve of mine. You’re right, while a phrase is maybe about four to five moves at most, the purpose of the birthday jam is less about building up to something and more to celebrate the ‘honoree’. The phrase (assuming an 8 bar phrase) is the minimal requirement before the ‘dancer of honor’ is just getting gang banged by those wanting to dance with him/her. Know what I mean? Say NO to dance gang bangs!